There’s much too much of everything these days at Seattle Grace Hospital: too much sex (that’s okay), too much cheating, and even too many babies. Seriously. Alex cheats on Izzie, Meredith is having too much sex, Cristina is getting “keyed,” and the hospital is housing a woman who is giving birth to quintuplets. Much too much.

          Meredith is trying to get over McDreamy. So she’s having a lot of sex. Really, what’s wrong with that? I’m joking. There’s obviously something wrong with that. When did sex go from being something special to being something sleazy? Did I just say that? But you know what I say, whatever gets you through the day. If Meredith is happy the way she is, then what’s the problem? There is no problem, except she’s not happy. She isn’t happy. She’s trying to get over Derek and she thinks sleeping with any guy she sees will help her get over him. But ever one night-stand is cheaper than the other. I know that her relationship with McDreamy is at the core of the show, but it’s time she started feeling happy again. Is anyone with me?

          I really liked the talk George gave Meredith. He analyzed he to the T. He knows what’s going on in her head and he hates the way she’s treating me. He obviously wants to have a chance with her, but it doesn’t seem like that’s going to happen. George is looking for a strong solid relationship; that’s the last thing Meredith wants. She still wants a lot of sex. I liked George telling Meredith that not all guys are despicable. This is true.

          Burke asked Cristina to move in with him. I should have seen this one coming. Burke assumes he knows everything about Cristina. Oh was he wrong? Yeah, she’s fun to hang around with and yeah, she’s a focused woman, but clean she is not. Did you see her house? It looked like a rat’s haven. If I had to live in that house, I would honestly go mad. And for Burke and Cristina to do it on the floor… I’m a clean freak. I’m picky about these things. Do you blame me? I loved the way he “keyed” her. Burke left it in her coffee cop. Before she could drink her coffee.  Next time Burke, if you’re going to drop a bombshell on Cristina, let her drink her coffee first.

          Addison and Derek did it. Addison looked like she had just gone to Heaven and Derek looked like he had just gone to Hell. Addy is not Meredith and Derek knows it. Steve “broken penis guy” is not Derek and Meredith knows it. If it wasn’t as exciting for McDreamy as it once was, then it’s time he fesses up to it and breaks off this stupid marriage. I hate lifeless marriages.

          The quintuplets storyline is an interesting one. And I hope it’s not over. I don’t think it. I’ve wanted them to do something like this: have a case that is explored over two or three episodes. It’s an effective way to bring people back. I also loved the fact every character was involved in the story. Every intern was needed and every attending was needed. That OR room was full. It must feel really stuffy in there sometimes. I feel bad for Dorie. All her doctors told her to give up two of the fetuses; the other three would be healthier. She got too attached to them. Who can blame her?

Dear Diary

Izzie: Should I be surprised? I mean seriously. Alex cheated on me with Olivia. That little slut. He couldn’t have sex with me all day, and then he jumps right back into to bed with the syphilis nurse. I am amazing in bed. I don’t get how he doesn’t see that. I gave him so many opportunities to do it. I’m flawless and I look amazing. What the hell is wrong with him? I should have seen it coming. I’m an idiot for thinking that he could change. He was acting so much sweeter and so much more human. Seriously. And just when we needed him for the quints operation. That’s one good thing that happened today; a pregnant mother gave birth to quints. It’s heartbreaking though. Each one has its own little problem. At first I thought it was ridiculous. Why would the mother Dorie keep five fetuses when she could have had three healthy ones? But she was so happy. She already named them and she knew each baby’s personality. It was beautiful to watch. Now I understand why she wanted to keep them all.

Meredith: This was the most embarrassing day of my life. Steven, my one night-stand, came to the hospital with a broken penis. Yeah, I’m not kidding. You had to see my shock when I saw him come up to me with a coat over his penis. To make matters worse, his case was neuro. Derek had to examine. He examined my one night-stand. Worse, I had to tell Derek when Steve last ejaculated. That was mortifying. Then George called me a slut. He said I should go for quality rather than quantity. I am not some kind of slut. I’m sorry. I am not. Besides, what does George care? How does that bother him? I am not a slut.

Today’s Baileyisms

-          “Don’t make me chase you down. I’m growing a person in here.”

-          Bailey: “There’ll be lots of labs, lots of needles, and painful procedures. Procedures which might make you wish you never had a penis. You sure you don't want to change your story?”

Quotable Quotes

-          Meredith: “You’re going through his stuff, aren’t you?”

Cristina: “There’s no stuff to go through. It’s a freak show. I mean, you can do surgery in here. Oh, he arranged his books using the Dewey Decimal system! Mer, I’m scared.”

Meredith: “Get out, get out of the house--now.”

-          Izzie: “And I shall name him: Running Guy.”

-          Robert Martin: “I need a drink! Are you the stewardess?”

-          Izzie (to Dorie): “Guess when you take those fertility pills, you should read the fine print, huh?”

-          Meredith: “They always look so sad when I kick them out. Seriously, why do guys not understand that when you pick them up in a bar and take them home for sex, that there are no picket fences or kids in your future?”

-          Cristina: “It’s not my fault you broke the guy’s penis.” Seriously.

Dory : “Oh, another Dr. Shepherd.”

Addison: “He’s my husband, actually.”

Dory: “Seriously?”

Derek: “Mm-hmm.”

Dory: “Wow. Look at you two. Everybody must hate you.”

Addison & Derek: “Oh, you have no idea.” This was funny.

-          Cristina: “What the hell is this?”

Burke: “It’s a key.”

Cristina: “Why?”

Burke: “Why is it a key? Are we feeling existential this morning?”

Cristina: “Well, if the key turns in a lock, and no one asked for the key or even wanted the key, does it make a sound?”

-          George: “Maybe it’s a, a m-matter of volume?”

Meredith: “Oh, so now I’m a slut?”

George: “I think you’re taking some risks. I think you’ll find yourself in some guy’s basement being ordered to put the lotion on the skin or you’ll get the hose again.”

-          Steve: “Your boyfriend gave you a key to his place?”

Cristina: “Why is he talking?”

Some Final Notes

-          I laughed when Cristina spit her toothpaste in Burke’s kitchen sink.

-          Everyone is having sex in the opening scenes. It must be Grey’s Anatomy.

-          I loved hearing Izzie say she needs sex “NOW!”

-          Addison has signed to stay in Seattle.

-          Dorie already has triplets.

-          Steve can’t get rid of his erection.

-          I loved Dorie commenting on how everybody must hate the Shepherds.

-          Meredith asked Cristina to do her enema for Steve.

-          The patient Richard Martin had a tumor which made him think he’s thirsty. Alex and Olivia found him drinking water from the toilet bowl.

-          George tells Meredith that not all guys are a nightmare. I would like to second that.

-          Martin made his assistant Doyle run away.

-          Alex fried Martin’s brain. Come on Alex.

-          The five babie: Lucy needs brain surgery, Emily needs heart surgery, Charlotte can’t breathe, Kate seems to be okay, and Julie has organs growing outside her body.

-          Cristina’s house is disguisting. I wouldn’t be surprised if rats were living in there. I can’t believe she just buys new underwear rather than washing.

-          Derek said it hurt to see Meredith sleep with someone else.

-          Izzie caught Alex and Olivia having sex. Alex is really in for it.

I’m dying for next week. Four stars

-          Next episode

-          Grey’s Anatomy season 2

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